Pride

[prahyd] noun

1.

a high or inordinate opinion of one’s own dignity, importance, merit, or superiority, whether as cherished in the mind or as displayed in bearing, conduct, etc.

2.

the state or feeling of being proud.

3.

a becoming or dignified sense of what is due to oneself or one’s position or character; self-respect; self-esteem.

Pride, one of the Seven Deadly Sins…if you believe in that sort of thing, which I don’t.

I don’t see anything wrong with having pride in yourself and your accomplishments. I have pride whenever I finish writing a particular good piece of fiction or a blog post that has just the right ratio of snark to facts. I have pride that I got into the school of Journalism, that I’m finally able to go back to college. I still have pride that I got into a prestigious school, based on my writing portfolio, even though I never attended classes at that university.

I take pride in things that I accomplish on my own, things that I’ve worked hard at.

Unfortunately I don’t understand the usage of the word pride that gets tossed around. Like Gay Pride, or Women’s Pride (Yes, these events do exist.)

Why don’t I understand it? Well, it’s because I’m not proud of being a women, or proud of being gay.I’m not ashamed of those things either, which has somehow become the opposite of proud. If I’m not proud of it, I must be ashamed of it.

Let me put it to you this way and maybe you’ll understand.

I consider being gay or being a women to be random draws from the genetic lottery. I am no more proud of being gay or being female than I am of being tall, having hazel eyes, dirty blonde hair, or tricky double jointed knees and elbows.

I’m not proud of these things because I didn’t accomplish them. Random genetic selection while I was a fetus, accomplished these things.

Now I’m not ashamed of any of these attributes either. I’m as out as I want to be, though I don’t wave a rainbow flag. I’m a woman, which I’ve never felt bad about. I don’t wear colored contacts. I dye my hair, but I admit to that (I just think my natural color was boring). I often show off my tricky double jointed knees and elbows to my friends, much to their delighted disgust.

But they are just parts of my genetic code.

Now I tell you what you can be proud of. The people involved in getting equal rights for gay people, they can be proud about all the good they have accomplished over the years. Every person who stood for Women’s Suffrage, they can be proud of their accomplishments. That’s because it’s something they did, both groups dedicated time, money, and, sometimes, their freedom, to a cause they believed in. That’s a reason to be proud.

Being proud of the genetic quirks of your DNA double helix, just doesn’t make sense. You want to be proud? You want a reason to have a parade? Then do something.