The Only Thing Worse Than an Audit is a Colonoscopy; Now You Get Both from the Same People

Putting the IRS in charge or Obamacare seems like a mistake of epic proportions, especially with the recent knowledge that the IRS has been harassing Tea Party groups, pro-constitution groups, pro-life organizations, Pro-Israel, and religious institutions.

I foresee the following happening.

Patient to Obamacare IRS office: I need medical attention.

Obamacare IRS office: Yes, I can help you with that. I just need you to fill out these forms.

Patient: Holy crap, I’m going to need treatment for carpal tunnel too after filling these out.

IRS office: You’ll need to fill out a different set of forms for those, let me get those for you. *hands patient a stack of paperwork twice the size of the first one*

Patient: *begins filling out paperwork* Hey, why do you need to know what political party I’m registered too? AND who I voted for last election?

IRS office: It’s standard procedure.

Patient: Okay…wait, you need to know what books I’ve read in the last year?!

IRS: With a summary of the content as well, yes.

Patient: You want a book report?

IRS: Standard-

Patient: -Procedure, I know. Hey, you can’t ask me if I own guns. That has nothing to do with my medical needs.

Big Surprise: Sandra Fluke Lied

I know, I know, this is old news, but let me ramble.

I recently tangled with an idiot over whether or not Sandra Fluke wanted her college (or the American people) to pay for her sex life (and the sex life of every other woman on the campus). Their argument, as is typical, is that Fluke wasn’t making an argument about needing birth control for sexual reasons, she wanted the school to provide it for medical reasons. PCOS (Polycystic Ovarioan Syndrome) being the most popular of these medical reason for liberals (and Fluke herself) to bring up. She claimed that students who had PCOS, or other medical needs the necessitated using birth control, could not get the birth control they needed because of Georgetown’s insurance policies.

This was, of course, a load of horse manure and 1o seconds on a google could prove it. So it always struck me as odd that so many people spent time debating Fluke’s demands based on the morality of them or the 1st amendment issues. Yes, the 1st amendment is hugely important, but common sense is important too, which is why smacking Fluke in the face with the actual Georgetown student insurance policy (specifically the FAQ section of it) several times would have been more useful.

I Don’t Get This Whole “Coming Out” Thing

Everyone is talking up a storm about Jason Collins, a pro-basketball player who just announced that he’s gay to the entire world.

Or at least everyone who reads Sports Illustrated.

I don’t, so I had to wait for the rest of the world to catch up and start frantically covering it in the news and on twitter to hear about it. I just shrugged and said “Okay? So?”

I’ve never understood the need to make a huge spectacle of your personal life.

Well that’s a lie, I used to bring up my sexuality in conversations when I was in 9th grade and I was an obnoxious little liberal troll, but that’s about it.

I didn’t make a big production of coming out, in fact I usually came out by accident, because I would talk about “my girlfriend said…” as normally as I would have said “my boyfriend said…” in a conversation. So I would say that and people would interrupt the flow of the conversation to say “Whoah, whoa there!….you’re gay?” I would confirm and then we would carry on with the conversation.

What I didn’t do was take out a page in the school newspaper to announce that, yes, the obnoxiously smart kid in the freshmen class was, in fact, a lesbian.

What is it about being gay that leads famous people to announce it to the world? They don’t feel the need to announce their straightness to the world and they still make plenty of headlines. Why not just live your life and answer the question honestly if you are asked and you want to let people know that you live with a person of the same sex and not the opposite.

Maybe I’m more annoyed by this because I wish that the Gosnell trial or Benghazi or Fast and Furious had gotten even half the amount of media coverage this is getting. Why in the world is the sexuality of an NBA player more important than the murder of small children or the death of American citizens? Why is it that our culture has more interest in the sexuality of a Basketball player than they do in terrorism or foreign policy.

I know, I know, the latter seems awful boring and the former is titillating and interesting.

To some anyway.

I probably wouldn’t even be writing an article about this if it weren’t for the fact that Obama still hasn’t said a word about Gosnell, but he apparently too the time to call up Jason Collins and let him know how proud of him he is.

It’s that I don’t think he should be gay or that I don’t think he’s brave for announcing it, it’s just that I don’t care.

And more to the point, the fact that anyone DOES care when someone announces their sexuality is a black mark against what the gay community is supposedly trying to accomplish. My straight friends don’t preface the announcement that they are dating someone with “Oh right, I’m straight, so don’t be shocked when I announce that my significant other is the opposite sex”. Neither do I and that has, to date, never been a problem for me. I thought the gay community wanted to be accepted the same way? Which doesn’t involve making a big production out of announcing which gender you sleep with.

I don’t announce that I’m gay when I meet a new group of people, I just act like a normal human being. My sexuality is not who I am, though I admit to employing it to make liberals heads explode, but that’s also part of who I am. If you talked to most of the people who met me at CPAC or Right Online in last year or so, they would tell you that they were not aware I was gay until they heard me talk about my girlfriend or they got home and checked my twitter bio.

That, ideally, should be how people operate. Why would Jason Collins want to be known as “the gay NBA player” for the rest of time? Like being gay is who he is?

Then again, maybe being gay is who he is. Perhaps he’s like all those liberal gay activists that feel the need to wear rainbow bracelets and a shirt announcing that they’re here and they’re queer.

If that’s your identity, fine. Don’t expect the rest of us to get all excited by it.

New Article @ Damn Straight Politics

Would You Like Some Cheese With That Whine?: Obama’s Presser 4-30-13

If I answered questions that my parents asked (because, let’s face it, in a world where Journalism did what it was supposed to, they would be holding Obama accountable for his actions) the way Obama did, I would have been grounded for most of my life.

Straight answers? What are those?

Whining? His preferred method of passing the buck. The buck does not apparently stop here. Congress is always at fault.

One thing Obama has managed to perfect over the years is the long, rambling answer that makes it look like he’s put a lot of thought into his response and that he’s answering the question thoroughly, but when you actually listen to what he’s saying, 99% of it has nothing to do with the question.

Michelle Obama: Utterly Gaffetastic

Basically Michelle Obama at all times.

Michelle Obama is known for two things, her arms and her clothes, neither of which I find attractive.

She’s known to me by a third thing, she has a habit of jumping headfirst into some really spectacularly poorly thought out words and actions.

Like that time she said ”for the first time in my adult life I am proud of my country” at two different stops in Wisconsin in 2008. Even if she didn’t mean it the way it sounds, it still sounds pretty bad. Who let her speak off teleprompter?

Or how about the time (last month) when Michelle Obama paired up with John Kerry (who is even more gaffetastic than Mrs. Obama) to give the Secretary of State’s International Women of Courage Award to Samira Ibrahim who has a history of anti-Semitic and anti-American sentiments.

On Twitter, Ibrahim is quite blunt regarding her views. On July 18 of last year, after five Israeli tourists and a Bulgarian bus driver were killed a suicide bombing attack, Ibrahim jubilantly tweeted: “An explosion on a bus carrying Israelis in Burgas airport in Bulgaria on the Black Sea. Today is a very sweet day with a lot of very sweet news.”

Ibrahim frequently uses Twitter to air her anti-Semitic views. Last August 4, commenting on demonstrations in Saudi Arabia, she described the ruling Al Saud family as “dirtier than the Jews.” Seventeen days later she tweeted in reference to Adolf Hitler: “I have discovered with the passage of days, that no act contrary to morality, no crime against society, takes place, except with the Jews having a hand in it. Hitler.”

Ibrahim holds other repellent views as well. As a mob was attacking the United States embassy in Cairo on the eleventh anniversary of 9/11, pulling down the American flag and raising the flag of Al Qaeda, Ibrahim wrote on twitter: “Today is the anniversary of 9/11. May every year come with America burning.” Possibly fearing the consequences of her tweet, she deleted it a couple of hours later, but not before ascreen shot was saved by an Egyptian activist.

- Weekly Standard

The First Lady and Secretary of State later put the award on hold.

Maybe someone reminded them how impossible such an action on their parts would be to salvage.

Now she out proving that the Secret Service really does not do their job, because they were letting her visit a Saudi National who had been put on a terror watch list recently (though he was also mysteriously removed from the list later) and was given “Section 212, 3B terrorist designation despite inquiries from Sen. Grassley and members of the House Homeland Security Committee.” (The Blaze)

Huh what? Okay, he was injured in the Boston Marathon Bombing and the First Lady was, reportedly, visiting other victims at various hospitals, but that does not explain why she was allowed within 5 feet of someone on a terrorist watch list.

What the hell is going on here?

Thanks for proving again that you have no common sense and even less good judgment Michelle. Great job!

_________

Maybe she’s just trying to keep up appearances so Iran won’t revoke the “wet gunpowder award” (for “revealing the influence that the White House sways over the Hollywood film industry” [gateway pundit]) they awarded her earlier this year.

_____________

Update: Michelle Obama apparently visited the Saudi National who was on a terrorist watch list, but DIDN’T visit the athlete, Jeff Bauman, who lost both his legs and helped the police identify the bombers. Huh?

Put Up or Shut Up

Frankly I’m shocked that North Korea actually nailed themselves to the wall by giving us an announcement of the date they will launch a missile on.

That date being April 10th, which is…tomorrow. 

They’ve also been rumored to be moving their Ambassador out of the UK and they’ve warned foreigners to leave South Korea.

I almost wonder if they have something else planned, since putting the Seventh Fleet on high alert is the height of stupidity.

Then again, this is North Korea, where they believe in Unicorns and thing Kim Jong Il invented the hamburger, so…

The issue here is that they have painted themselves into a corner whether they fire a missile tomorrow or not. If they don’t fire it, no one will ever take them seriously ever again (as if we really did before). If they fire it and it (as I suspect) completely fails to be a successful launch, no one will ever take them seriously again.

And if they launch it and it actually gets anywhere near South Korea, the Seventh Fleet will shoot it out of the air and we will officially have a reason to stomp them flat in about 2.5 seconds.

Then again you have to take into account our current administration.

Does anyone else think that it’s a coincidence that North Korea has gone from saber rattling to nuclear missiles just at the time when we have a man in office who is about as effective in foreign policy as Carter and seems to have a fetish for sanctions and warnings from the UN?

Yeah, I didn’t think I was the only one thinking that these two things were linked.

Will our president actually make the right decision here? He usually doesn’t, but this could be another Bin Laden type situation…who wants to be the President remembered as the one let South Korea get nuked by North Korea. No one, that’s who.

So I’m praying he has enough common sense to realize that.

Am I the only one wishing they would just fire the damn missiles already so we can get this over with?

Freedom of Speech is Great…Unless You Offend Me: Another Thing Islam and Liberalism Have in Common

“This is offensive!”

I hear this all the time from liberals online, usually in response to something true that I’ve posted that sort of punches their worldview in the face.

In Breitbart fashion I respond: So?

Sometimes people in the Ann Coulter tag on tumblr start talking about how someone should “shut that b*tch up” and wondering why she’s “still allowed to talk?”

My response: The First Amendment.

You don’t have a right to not be offended, you don’t have a right to not be insulted, and you really don’t have a right to tell me it’s illegal to criticize your religion, your behavior, or anything else I choose.

For some reason liberals and Muslims both would like the government, in some way, to stop me from saying things that offend them.

Professor At State University Pressures Students to Stomp on Paper with “Mohammed” Written on it, White House Expresses Outrage at this “Horrible Assault of First Amendment”

A Muslim student in a class at a state university was horribly perturbed when, last week, one of his professor’s gave an assignment to his class that involved writing the name of Mohammed on a sheet of paper in large letters. The professor then requested that they put the paper on the floor and stomp on it.

The student refused to take part in the assignment and lodged a complaint with the school against the professor.

The professor, who has claimed that the assignment was only being used as an exercise in critical thinking and was not intended to be offensive toward Muslim students, has been place on administrative leave until the case can be looked at further and a formal apology on the behalf of the University has been given to the student who lodged the complaint.

The leader of the organization CAIR (The Council for Islamic-American Relations) has filed a lawsuit against the university and openly called them out for hiring such a blatantly Islamophobic professor.

Meanwhile the President and Secretary of State personally called the student in question to apologize for their 1st Amendment rights being so horribly violated and swore that they would “get” the person who published this horrible lesson plan that was so disrespectful to Islam.

Burning of the American flag has gone up in the Middle East and many fear that more riots will be occur in the Middle East as result of this culturally insensitive action taken by a professor.

_______________

Oh wait, no…that’s not the actual story. The actual story is that a Christian student was almost thrown out of his university for refusing to take part in a lesson that involved writing “JESUS” on a sheet of paper and then stomping on it.

The professor hasn’t been punished, the incident hasn’t been investigated, there has CERTAINLY not been any calls made to the student from the President or the Secretary of State (they save that kind of time for people like Sandra Fluke and blaming youtube videos for inciting riots) and the student was only recently allowed to come back to school because of several lawyers offering to take the case pro bono and the extreme amount of public outrage on the issue.

The scenario I laid out would be realistic if the professor had chosen Islam as his example for a lesson on “critical thinking”, but when it happens to Christianity the person who files the complaint nearly gets kicked out of school.

Yeah, that’s some equality we got here.

The Answer to the 2.7 Million Dollar Question: I Drink Because Obama is in Office

If I looked like her I would drink a lot too…

In this post-Sequester world the Obama administration is doing its utmost to cut back on useless and wasteful spending. They are only spending money on the most necessary of projects, like 2.7 million dollars on the gravely serious issue of lesbians and their “hazardous drinking habits”.

Oh, you don’t think that is a necessary research project for the government to be funding? Well you, my dear reader, are clearly a horrid homophobe. Weren’t you aware that the government only exists to do irrelevant studies about the mental and physical well-being of the LGBTQUERTY community?

*eye roll*

Seriously though, this isn’t the first time (nor will it probably be the last) that the NIH announced a dumb as hell study with ties to the health and well-being of the gay and lesbian community. For a group that composes less than 10% of the population (if that) the government spends an awful lot of money coddling them.*

Like the $1.5 million that the NIH just spent on trying to figure out why so many lesbians are obese. Yes, of course that’s an issue of national importance, why wouldn’t it be?

Or in 2011 when the NIH had a study, funded with nearly a million dollars, on whether gay men’s penis size indicated whether they would be a “top” or “bottom” in gay sex.

Can someone please explain why the National Institutes of Health feels this is a reasonable allocation of resources? Especially during a time when our country is apparently so strapped for cash that it can’t even allow school children in to the White House for tours and they threatened to shut down the yearly Easter Egg hunt?

Could it be that the government is only shutting down programs that will cause national outrage, because they want to make sequestration look as bad as their Chicken Little impersonations said it would be earlier this year?

Yeah, I figured that was what this was about.

You know Obama, if you are actually all that worried about my “hazardous drinking habits” and the effect they will have on my health, you could do me a huge favor and resign. The amount I drink is directly proportionate to the amount of time you spend in office and the number of stupid things you do.

Can I have that $2.7 million now? I’m sure I will spend it better than you will.

You know what I want a study on? I’d like to know why so many lesbians get Justin Bieber haircuts, that seems worthwhile to me. Can I get a couple million dollars to study that Mr. President? Inquiring minds (meaning mine) want to know.

____________

*I’m saying “them” because I refuse to be associated with these morons just because we all happen to be attracted to the same gender.

Just ’cause I said it, it don’t mean that I meant it: AKA Obama Takes Political Advice from an Adele Song

Thanks to ccindecision on tumblr for posting this.

“I’m not a dictator”

Obama said that only days ago.

I have news for you, saying something doesn’t make it so, actions do. Obama’s actions recently, and those his administration, are not those of a man who thinks that he has checks and balances working against him, or a constitution and bill of rights to uphold. If it walks like a dictator, talks like a dictator, and legislates like a dictator…it’s a dictator. At the very least a fledgling one.

Who cares about the war on women when our current administration waging a war on the bill of rights. They are stomping on the 1st amendment by  harassing journalists who try to ask them tough questions and hold them accountable, starting an overt war on the 2nd amendment, and haven’t given a damn about the 10th amendment (except when convenient) since Obama was sworn in.

And now the 4th and 5th amendment are taking the brunt of this administration’s disrespect to American principles.